By Talented Writer....(From my HomeTown :) )
Fifteen Life-Changing Seconds
Three months have already passed, and still the overwhelming feeling of plunging into space jerks me awake in the middle of the night – my forehead dripping with sweat and the beat of my heart quickening in anticipation for the exhilarating sensation that captured my mind and body the day I lay suspended from the highest peak in “Cedar Point”, the greatest amusement park in the world which I visited during my stay in the states on the LINC program. Being part of the LINC, however, isn’t all about rollercoaster rides but about the chance to interact with others, exchange strong beliefs, and explore the possibilities of change in attitude, personality, or ethics. I experienced my personal change in all three during those breath-taking fifteen seconds when the ride stops at its uppermost height, to take a deep breath before it plummets to the ground. If there’s one thing in the world that used to terrify me more than the sight of my elder sister in the morning, is the thought of standing at the edge of a mountain and looking down into the depth of the valley. So what on earth was I doing in “Cedar Point” surrounded by roller coasters not less than 200 feet high? I joked about riding them all, but when I set my eyes on “THE POWER TOWER” – the highest of all, it sent shivers of excitement down my spine. Deep down under layers and layers of irrational fear I knew that if I didn’t go through with it, years from now, I’ll be filled with remorse for my foolishness. So I found myself steering Anilu, the person who made my life all the more beautiful because of her love and passion, and Jesse, the brother I never had, towards the ride. Without even realizing what I was doing or noticing the stunned faces of both my companions I was waiting along with hundreds of other people in line. This wasn’t just an ordinary queue where people were waiting to get their donuts – this was a queue to ride the highest rollercoaster in the world, so you can imagine how much time I had to reconsider my impulsive behaviour especially after seeing the ride over and over again and seeing the yellow and white faces that emerged victorious ads if they’ve just faced death and conquered it. With every step that brought me closer to the inevitable confrontation of my phobia, the pace of my heart beat grew faster and louder until I was afraid my chest was going to burst with anticipation along with excitement and excessive fear. I started having second thoughts, and at one point I decided to go back, but Jesse caught me by the shoulders, steadied me, looked into my face and said: “You decided to go through this for a reason, so stick to your decision because there’s no point in turning back. Focus on overcoming you fear and not the means.” I conceded to his logical argument and I knew hiding forever wasn’t going to help, so when it was finally our turn I bravely stepped into my seat where I was dangled from the top, and it began going up gradually and slowly as if it didn’t have a care in the world. I dreaded the top like I dreaded the fall itself, and I was torn apart between wanting to reach the top and getting over with it and never wanting to go through with it in the first place. We were nearing the peak and I couldn’t stand the pain in my stomach any longer, and the flimsy sweater I was wearing did nothing to prevent the biting cold of the air, which smelled of horror and dread, from penetrating my nerves, and I felt that if the apprehension didn’t kill me, I would surely freeze to death. I was having breathing difficulties and I felt my lungs were going to burst from the pressure, but the ride wouldn’t stop. I tasted bitter blood on my lips and I realized I had unconsciously bitten it to reduce the pain in my chest, but my attempt was in vain. Suddenly we stopped, and I felt the bile rising up in my mouth and I forced it down unwillingly. The pounding of my heart was so loud it omitted every other sound around me, and although “Cedar Point” roared with shouts of glee and fright the silence was ear-splitting to me. I was literarily out of breath by now, and I was afraid of suffocating, so I squeezed both hands on each side of me with such vigour that I might have cracked a few bones. I looked on each side and was greeted by Anilu’s radiant face, her eyes shut in concentration counting the seconds and praying to survive this, and Jesse a smile spread upon his face making his features all the more handsome. I’ll never forget Anilu’s selfless act in trying to comfort me by words that touched my soul while facing her demons as well. Jesse, like her, read my thoughts as a book and looked at me meaningfully and said: “Think of Harry Potter…he used to fly much higher.” The shout of laughter that erupted from the pit of my stomach was alien to me, but both their words helped erase some of the tension building up inside. During those fifteen seconds, I looked around me and found my self surrounded by the people I love facing a near death experience, and suddenly life seemed more precious to grasp and hold on to, and the wall of cynicism I once built as a young child started crumbling. I fell…the last word I uttered was the innocent plea for help: “MOM”. It was the swiftest fall I could have imagined and the more I plunged down the more liberated I felt as if I was leaving all my flaws and mistakes behind and starting a new leaf. It took me only fifteen seconds to realize how significant life is meanwhile it takes some forever to figure it out and by then it’d be too late, and for that I am grateful. Gone were all the pessimistic views, and gone were all the cynical remarks, for the person who buckled her seatbelt at the beginning of the ride emerged a new one at the end of it. I know now that it’s possible to triumph over your inner-most fears thought different experiences, and all it took for me was the simple act of rising then falling. “THE POWER TOWER” was just a symbol for challenges more to come. It was a turning point in my life because it gave me the confidence I needed to face those challenges and rise above them. Tests no longer make me feel as nervous as I still remember the intensity of the emotions I felt, straddled between my guardians at 400 feet in the air, and the test becomes a trivial thing. I think I’m finally able to look at my sister in the face on Sunday morning without recoiling back in fear.
By: Reem Harb
Three months have already passed, and still the overwhelming feeling of plunging into space jerks me awake in the middle of the night – my forehead dripping with sweat and the beat of my heart quickening in anticipation for the exhilarating sensation that captured my mind and body the day I lay suspended from the highest peak in “Cedar Point”, the greatest amusement park in the world which I visited during my stay in the states on the LINC program. Being part of the LINC, however, isn’t all about rollercoaster rides but about the chance to interact with others, exchange strong beliefs, and explore the possibilities of change in attitude, personality, or ethics. I experienced my personal change in all three during those breath-taking fifteen seconds when the ride stops at its uppermost height, to take a deep breath before it plummets to the ground. If there’s one thing in the world that used to terrify me more than the sight of my elder sister in the morning, is the thought of standing at the edge of a mountain and looking down into the depth of the valley. So what on earth was I doing in “Cedar Point” surrounded by roller coasters not less than 200 feet high? I joked about riding them all, but when I set my eyes on “THE POWER TOWER” – the highest of all, it sent shivers of excitement down my spine. Deep down under layers and layers of irrational fear I knew that if I didn’t go through with it, years from now, I’ll be filled with remorse for my foolishness. So I found myself steering Anilu, the person who made my life all the more beautiful because of her love and passion, and Jesse, the brother I never had, towards the ride. Without even realizing what I was doing or noticing the stunned faces of both my companions I was waiting along with hundreds of other people in line. This wasn’t just an ordinary queue where people were waiting to get their donuts – this was a queue to ride the highest rollercoaster in the world, so you can imagine how much time I had to reconsider my impulsive behaviour especially after seeing the ride over and over again and seeing the yellow and white faces that emerged victorious ads if they’ve just faced death and conquered it. With every step that brought me closer to the inevitable confrontation of my phobia, the pace of my heart beat grew faster and louder until I was afraid my chest was going to burst with anticipation along with excitement and excessive fear. I started having second thoughts, and at one point I decided to go back, but Jesse caught me by the shoulders, steadied me, looked into my face and said: “You decided to go through this for a reason, so stick to your decision because there’s no point in turning back. Focus on overcoming you fear and not the means.” I conceded to his logical argument and I knew hiding forever wasn’t going to help, so when it was finally our turn I bravely stepped into my seat where I was dangled from the top, and it began going up gradually and slowly as if it didn’t have a care in the world. I dreaded the top like I dreaded the fall itself, and I was torn apart between wanting to reach the top and getting over with it and never wanting to go through with it in the first place. We were nearing the peak and I couldn’t stand the pain in my stomach any longer, and the flimsy sweater I was wearing did nothing to prevent the biting cold of the air, which smelled of horror and dread, from penetrating my nerves, and I felt that if the apprehension didn’t kill me, I would surely freeze to death. I was having breathing difficulties and I felt my lungs were going to burst from the pressure, but the ride wouldn’t stop. I tasted bitter blood on my lips and I realized I had unconsciously bitten it to reduce the pain in my chest, but my attempt was in vain. Suddenly we stopped, and I felt the bile rising up in my mouth and I forced it down unwillingly. The pounding of my heart was so loud it omitted every other sound around me, and although “Cedar Point” roared with shouts of glee and fright the silence was ear-splitting to me. I was literarily out of breath by now, and I was afraid of suffocating, so I squeezed both hands on each side of me with such vigour that I might have cracked a few bones. I looked on each side and was greeted by Anilu’s radiant face, her eyes shut in concentration counting the seconds and praying to survive this, and Jesse a smile spread upon his face making his features all the more handsome. I’ll never forget Anilu’s selfless act in trying to comfort me by words that touched my soul while facing her demons as well. Jesse, like her, read my thoughts as a book and looked at me meaningfully and said: “Think of Harry Potter…he used to fly much higher.” The shout of laughter that erupted from the pit of my stomach was alien to me, but both their words helped erase some of the tension building up inside. During those fifteen seconds, I looked around me and found my self surrounded by the people I love facing a near death experience, and suddenly life seemed more precious to grasp and hold on to, and the wall of cynicism I once built as a young child started crumbling. I fell…the last word I uttered was the innocent plea for help: “MOM”. It was the swiftest fall I could have imagined and the more I plunged down the more liberated I felt as if I was leaving all my flaws and mistakes behind and starting a new leaf. It took me only fifteen seconds to realize how significant life is meanwhile it takes some forever to figure it out and by then it’d be too late, and for that I am grateful. Gone were all the pessimistic views, and gone were all the cynical remarks, for the person who buckled her seatbelt at the beginning of the ride emerged a new one at the end of it. I know now that it’s possible to triumph over your inner-most fears thought different experiences, and all it took for me was the simple act of rising then falling. “THE POWER TOWER” was just a symbol for challenges more to come. It was a turning point in my life because it gave me the confidence I needed to face those challenges and rise above them. Tests no longer make me feel as nervous as I still remember the intensity of the emotions I felt, straddled between my guardians at 400 feet in the air, and the test becomes a trivial thing. I think I’m finally able to look at my sister in the face on Sunday morning without recoiling back in fear.
By: Reem Harb
posted by Hamze | 10:15 PM
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